By Elaine Marze
People frequently discuss the things they miss most about their late spouse, and as a widow myself, I like to share these with couples who still have their loved one because it reminds them to appreciate what they have while they can. Do not take a husband or wife for granted.
Bill in Keithville told me he misses mornings on the back porch with his wife. He said that’s when they planned their day and discussed family and community issues. “Since she died, morning coffee is the loneliest thing I do.”
Jim in Arkansas said he decided to drive on up to Branson, MO to see a show like he and his late wife used to do. “It just wasn’t the same, me sitting there alone. There were all these couples together, and I was by myself. I won’t be doing that again.”
“I miss Cliff the most when I’m in a big group of people, I always knew that he would be looking just for me – that I was the most important person in that room to him. Oddly enough, I feel more alone in a large group of people than when I am home by myself,” Debra in Shreveport shared.
“The thing I miss most about Donnie is his touch,” said Vickie, also of Shreveport.
Linda of Tyler, Texas said she misses her husband’s hugs the most. “It’s all I can do not to wrap myself around any man who hugs me and just cling to him! I wish I could just feel that security again instead of always feeling so alone.”
When the bond of a deeply committed couple is dissolved through no fault of their own, there is a tsunami of feelings and issues involved and unresolved. Don’t waste your married life fussing and feuding over unimportant things; appreciate the time you have together because it could end tomorrow.
Elaine Marze is the author of several books including: WIDOWHOOD: I DIDN’T ASK FOR THIS, and she writes for various publications. She is Marketing Director at S.A.F.E. Planning in Shreveport.